Creepy People

I was thinking over some of the weirder people I've had in the past year or so and here are some of the real winners:

19 year old female comes in with abdominal pain, worked up numerous times. She's laying in the bed with the covers up to her chin, you would have thought she was 12. She had this older man with her who looked like a rat, actually. He was all up in her shit, when asked when her last menstrual was, he responded with the date. Freak. While being discharged, he didn't leave the room for her to get dressed. Found out later he was her step-father. I mean, whose father, let alone their step-creep knows when their last menstrual was?

Older gentleman comes in with his wife and a couple of her girlfriends. He had been discharged earlier that day after having a foley removed, now has clots and bleeding coming out of his pee pee. I go in and he's standing there stark naked, saluting the flag in all it's glory while the wife and her girlfriends are all a clucking. Geezus, man. Okay, I see you had some weird-ass penile implant back in the 80's, but what's up with you and all these old ladies?

One creepy dude was sitting with his mother, who was maybe 55 and totally cognizant of the situation. She had to have a rectal and he didn't budge. Who wants to see their mother get a rectal exam? What is wrong with that mother? Where do these people come from?

Not to mention all these guys who refuse to step aside while their baby mama gets a ride in the stir-ups. Bro, please.

Oh, and the young guy who came in with his "wife who is a doctor" crying and moaning over the worst abdominal pain ever, ever, ever. A urinalysis revealed he had 3+ yeast, along with a few other yucky things. How many guys have you sent home with Cipro and Diflucan? Can you say ManGina?