For What It's Worth

So, I get a text message last week from one of my co-workers that stated “Guess who they are training for relief charge?” Uh, IDK? When she texts me back all I could do was respond with LMAO, HAHAHA!

I had been off a few days and when I came back it was the talk of the department. People were pulling me into the hall closet to tell me they were going to HR and calling corporate compliance and all sorts of foolishness. Some had already spruced up their resumes and sent them out. Me, I was annoyed at the choice but after a gazillion years in nursing not surprised at all.

They picked Nurse Nasal Whiny Voice, a nurse a total of maybe 3 years. I think they must have been smoking crack or something because this 'thing' is a silly little girl. She’s always out by the ambulances hanging with the boys, or sitting at the desk slamming a new orientee and basically just being a worthless co-worker. She’s complained about everything under the sun you can imagine and has called in sick more times than I have in 20 years. She's the first to know any gossip going around and let's you know it. WTF were they thinking?

Me and my friend Double D were sitting in the shit area in the back last weekend, which some think is punishment but we think it’s great. We have our own little desk and mostly get LOL’s from nursing homes and minor stuff. We chit-chat all day long while we work and basically it’s real smooth. Nobody ever comes back there, let alone any charge nurse to see how things are going.

Around the corner comes Whiny asking us with her new super management authority type voice if we’re doing okay and is there anything she can do for us? Well ya'll know I’m old and hard of hearing so I totally kept doing what I was doing and so did Double D who is also hard of hearing. When we didn’t respond, she looked at us and repeated herself in a much louder and whinier nasal voice. I looked up slowly and told her we were fine and carried on as if she had never walked by.

We found out later she went up to the real charge nurse and said we were sitting on patients, loud and whiny enough for half the nurses station to hear. Of course, half the nurses station came and told us. That was fun, it was good times.

More to be revealed, I'm sure.